Earning Capacity and Special Educational Needs (SEN)

When I went through my divorce in 2015, my children were just 4 and 6 years old. My youngest was later diagnosed with Autism and Sensory Processing Disorder; we are currently undergoing assessment for ADHD. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to work; or that I wasn’t capable of working; but without childcare or financial support, my return to the workforce had to align with both my children’s growing independence and my own ability to manage the demands of single parenthood.

Before having children, I had built a successful career in the City; thriving in the fast-paced world of recruitment. I left for maternity leave just as I was poised for the next stage in my career; life, however, took a different course.

The concept for the reports I now write began during lockdown, when I was summoned back to Court to explain why I was no longer earning the “London salary” I once commanded. I was anxious about the process; how intimidating it felt the last time; and so I prepared a report for myself. It laid out my current circumstances, the steps I had taken to re-enter the workforce, and realistic projections for future earning potential as my children reached key developmental milestones; starting secondary school; learning to drive; and ultimately finishing education. These were not excuses; but context.

The reality is, my willingness to work was never in question. But like so many parents of children with additional needs, I encountered practical and emotional barriers that aren’t always visible in legal or employment settings. One of those barriers was a child newly diagnosed with Autism.

My experience as a parent of a child with Special Educational Needs has been, in every sense of the word, a journey. It is demanding; relentless; and often invisible to those who have not walked a similar path. Balancing the needs of a neurodivergent child alongside a neurotypical sibling as a single parent has stretched every part of me; my energy; my patience; my time; and my professional creativity.

I’ve adapted. I’ve worked in roles that fit around school hours; everything from cleaning to caring. My current working life is a blend of PAYE employment; self-employment; and agency work; giving me the flexibility I need to respond to the constantly shifting needs of my family. Early mornings; late nights; and weekend work are part of my routine; as they are for many working parents; especially during school holidays when I am the sole caregiver for 11 weeks of the year.

I share this personal background not for sympathy; but to provide context. Even those of us raised with a strong work ethic (I was cleaning cars at age 12!) can find it extraordinarily difficult to work at full earning capacity while raising children; especially children with additional needs.

Friends with neurotypical children sometimes say, “Everyone is on the spectrum.” But those of us parenting children with complex needs know the daily reality is different. Just yesterday, for example, my 14-year-old son; who struggles deeply with sensory issues; had a dentist appointment. I encouraged him to go on his own, to build his independence; but he was late, gripped by anxiety. He refused an X-ray because the plastic mouthpiece caused distress. I became anxious too; feeling the pressure of the situation. The dentist tried to reassure me; but ultimately, we had to leave without the X-ray.

After returning him to school at 10:30, I picked him up again at 12:30 to take him to his nurture garden session. I worked from 1pm to 3pm; then picked up my daughter, who’s currently preparing for her GCSEs. After dinner, we talked again; about his worries; about school tomorrow; about football and “why so many old people” were walking around. He speaks best in the car; without the pressure of eye contact. Our day ended at 10pm; but I was awake for hours, worrying if he would make it to school the next day.

Now, none of this; broken sleep; emotional labour; multiple trips; decoding the world for your child; is officially recognised as a barrier to work. Not in Court. Not on paper. But they are real; tangible responsibilities that affect how and when a parent can earn.

For the past five years, I’ve written earning capacity reports for a wide range of clients. Increasingly, I am asked to assess parents who are caring for SEN children; or who have SEN themselves. My reports are expert; independent; and evidence-based. They are not emotional appeals. But I will always include, as fact, the very real responsibilities that come with parenting a child with additional needs. Even if a Court may not recognise them as formal “barriers”; they are a significant part of the working reality for many.

I understand this role because I live it. I will always treat these stories with the compassion they deserve and present them in a way that is honest; professional; and grounded in lived experience.